FALLEN HERO

      The brutal murder of David Kato, a Ugandan human rights activist is both saddening and shocking yet it serves as a wake up call to all. I send my condolences to his friends and family for their bereavement at this time.
 
       While this issue has been addressed many a time by a number of bloggers, I think it is time the cloak and dagger games came to a stop. An innocent life has been lost in a grotesque manner. This goes to show how deep-seated the hate for LGBTI persons has become. It is indeed a grave issue that if not addressed might end up justifying the bloodshed of innocent people all because someone holds a different idea on whom they (not you) choose to express their love towards. To kill a fellow human with such savage I think ends up contradicting the same doctrines the anti-gay crusaders purport to stick to. Shame on all of you.

R.I.P. DAVID KATO

sharing rotten fruits

   I was previously in church this Sunday. As is predictable am not an ardent church-goer ever since ou pastor got it into his head that the bible has damned all sort of 'defiant' people gays and all included...I digress. Anyway, our pastor is sort of old-fashioned (not in a good way) to a fault. They had attended a seminar in Italy (church sponsored of course) and he had just come back a few days earlier.

And so my despair set in, he came back with a put-on Italian accent that tended to wear off when he spoke more than two words. So he was describing for us his trip to the olive country. He proceeded to narrate how he was assigned two roommates of whom one was gay and the other was a goth and they had all gone there for a spiritual retreat.

As you can guess, this did not go down well with lil' mister old-fashioned. He unashamedly narrated how he had to go complain to the seminary administration for mixing him with the wretched of the earth and for exposing him to 'communicable sin' (whatever that meant). As fate would have it, the administration simply rebuffed his attempts at being prejudiced against his roommates. He was instead told that if he felt too offended he could himself leave the seminary to which he obviously declined. So as a coping strategy, he preferred to get into the room at odd hours when all others had long been asleep. For the simple fact that the goth might attempt to suck his blood and the gay man might jump him and force him to do the monkey dance. At this point some people in the congregation seemed to find this funny for some reason unknown to the preacher. He went on to condemn his roommates to eternal fire and brimstone and the works. He ranted on and on as I wondered when the 'sharing' would end. He was basically fueling hate against LGBT, GOTHS and the western governments for allowing such 'devils' (his own words) to send us all to eternal damnation.

When the sermon was over a sort of discussion started at one of the church's exit (mind you this was a youth service). And interestingly enough, it was on social acceptance and I got drawn into it. The argument was on the premise of the preacher's experience with some saying that it was time for people to stop sticking their heads in the sand and wake up to the reality that there are such people among us and that they are no less human and I couldn't help but echo these sentiments. The preacher himself finally came in and after 30 minutes of deliberations, accusations and all the pastor and his supporters gave in since they couldn't prove their facts. I couldn't help but be amused at the preacher's tired attempt to smear peoples characters based on preferences. I was happy that in a small way all the publicity wasn't wasted in jolting the society into opening their eyes to what is around us all, and it won't go away just coz they wish it. While at the same time we (LGBT) should give time and be patient while avoiding the 'in your face' approach we are known for. It is not too far of that we shall be acknowledged.


*DISCLAIMER: This was in Karen where luckily the congregation is largely accommodating to varied ideologies. The same place where two boys kissed at the bus stop without stone-pelting and mob justice taking place. This may not always end so amicably in all places.

Crawl before walking let alone running.

As i write i remember am having loads of ideas but they arent fully formed.

I as a the gay youth i am have a quarrel to pick with our so-called gay activists. We all (the gay community, if it does exist!) keep complainin that we are not being allowed integration into the fabric of the african society.

I have sat back and thought long and hard about this. I am clearly stating that these are my views and you are allowed your own.

It is common knowledge that when you want to culture a practice into an individual you do it at the youngest age possible. No matter how much money gets poured into our activists's kitty, no matter how we bloggers shout at the rooftops, no matter how abrasive our advocaters become, this is a war we will surely lose and if by some miracle victory is attained, it will surely be a pyrrhic victory.

Walk with me on this one: i am not oblivious to the fact that some paranoid people have been alleging that there is a gay agenda which to date i have no evidence of. As one can decipher from my blog, am almost twenty. I am against legalisation of homosexuality in kenya but not for the normal clandestine reason that people prefer illegal encounters as they are more thrilling. Mine is a different path all together. I assume that 18 years by law is old enough to make a mature decision. If at all the so called GALCK (of which i have no knowledge of save from heresay, never mind the fact am gay!) had the time to sit down and monitor their progress (if any!) they would notice it was minute. That is because by the time i was 15 i knew i was 'different'. By the time i was 18 i almost had a feeling of self loathing. At 18 some sort of method should be in place to show them that it is not a perversion but rather a part of them. The main aim here is to give us self confidence on who we are inside and not our sexuality to define our future. I am saying this because someone did this for me and though he may not know it, what the guy did for me, to me was nothing short of a miracle and am not exaggerating! (Hats off to him n God bless him) it got me thinking what if every other person like me was so lucky? wouldnt it make us proud to be who we are? Most of us never get out to our family and friends because we are not happy with ourselves. Before we set our sights on legalisation, we first need to build a base in the form of youth who are proud of who they are. The western countries we see legalise it had to go through this first. When the youth are proud of themselves, they will be able to come out to their family and friends this will have a remarkable butterfly effect on stemming this monstrosity we call homophobia. So the next time we want homosexuality legalised, let us remember we need to learn that we can't start running without learning to walk let alone learning to crawl! Do have a lovely weekend as we mark May 17th, wontcha?

nightmare!

I know what you are thinking: what am I doing at 4 in the morning awake and trembling like a leaf? I had a dream that has recurred severally.
In my dream I get acquainted through some miraculous way to some people of my orientation. All goes well and is well under wraps but I forget the saying that it's not over till the fat lady sings. In the motions of that life I find a good friend and as most Hollywood crap would have you believe we fall in love and live happily ever after(yeah right!) Instead while we are at some place not clearly defined one thing leads to another and we start getting all mushy inside and start cuddling then all hell breaks loose!
My parents (out of god knows where!) decide to show up unannounced we scamper to our feet and as is expected I push him away having that offended look (the:who are you and what are you doing with me one, yes, that one!!) My mother stares in shock then to disbelief then downright contemptuous anger. I then wish the earth could swallow me my 'friend' and I start offering all kinds of moronic excuses: I don't know what got over me and all that sh*t!
Out of nowhere my father comes into the scene with a good ol' shotgun and believe me he is more than trigger friendly even more than our good ol' boys in blue would ever be. We run out and to our shock all the people I struggled to keep the secret from are there! I am swearing and running and crying all at the same time with the shotgun firing loudly behind us. In a fraction of a second my dear friend jumps in front of me and takes on for me and he falls motionless to the ground. all else around me goes silent as I kneel not knowing whether to feel responsible for the death or to be shocked my own father was going to shoot me in cold-blood!!!!!!!!!!
As I stare through tear-clouded eyes at my dying companion helpless with no one to come to my aid I start screaming and wake up to find myself in bed sweating and making a small noise (cliche I know). As I lay awake there on my bed the sadness and the brutal reality of that dream becomes a tangible fear almost choking. I wish I would die but then again I tell myself we've been through this and I can't change what I am. I walk to the computer knowing that is a war I may not be so lucky to win but I let it rest to the very last inevitable moment.
I dunno why I am writing this here but I guess it is a feeling of security knowing I can write what I feel without fear of victimization for I know there are others out here and yonder like myself with a caring heart. I love you all and take care out there... for you never know the time nor the place thou shalt be stricken by my idiotic, narrow-minded, barbaric, myopic and tunnel visioned homophobes !#@$^$*!!!! Forgive my abuses but it was just in the spirit of letting it all out.